Grade by Grade
D. Healthy Living ยท Healthy Living

My Mental Health: Everyday Choices and Managing Stress

D2.5 D3.3 A1.2 A1.1About 45 minutes
Learning goals
  • I can explain how everyday choices like sleep, activity, food, time with people and time outdoors can help my mental health.
  • I can tell the difference between stressful situations I have some control over and ones I have less control over.
  • I can use thinking strategies and action strategies to manage stress and adapt to challenges, and I know when to ask for help.

Words to know

mental health
How we think, feel and handle life. Everyone has mental health, just like everyone has physical health.
stress
The feeling of pressure or worry when something seems hard or challenging.
stressor
Something that causes stress, like a test, a move or an argument.
cope
To deal with something hard in a healthy way.
adapt
To adjust to a change or a new situation.
self-talk
The things you say to yourself inside your head.
resilience
The ability to bounce back after something hard.

Healthy body, healthy mind

When you hear "health," you might think of exercise and vegetables. But your mind has health too! Mental health is about how you think, feel and handle what happens in life. Everyone has mental health, and just like your body, you can take care of it every day. Today you'll learn everyday choices that help, and strategies to handle stress.

Remember from Grade 3

You learned that your brain has an alarm (the amygdala) that sets off fight, flight or freeze, and that external factors like noise, changes and pressure can cause strong feelings. You practised calming strategies like belly breathing. This year you'll learn when to use different strategies.

Everyday choiceHow it helps your mental health
Sleep ๐Ÿ˜ด (about 9 to 11 hours a night at your age)Rested brains handle feelings better, focus better and are less grumpy.
Being active โšฝ (at least 60 minutes a day of active play)Moving your body helps release stress and lifts your mood.
Eating regular, healthy meals ๐ŸŽSteady energy helps keep your mood and focus steady.
Time with family and friends ๐Ÿ‘จโ€๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€๐Ÿ‘งFeeling connected and that you belong protects mental health.
Time outdoors ๐ŸŒฒFresh air and nature help many people feel calmer.
Hobbies and creativity ๐ŸŽจDoing things you enjoy, like drawing, music, building or reading, brings joy.
Helping others ๐ŸคBeing kind and helpful makes you feel good too.
Balancing screen time ๐Ÿ“ฑToo much can hurt sleep and mood; balance leaves time for other healthy things.
Asking for help ๐Ÿ—ฃ๏ธTalking about feelings with someone you trust makes problems feel smaller.
Small choices every day add up to big benefits for your mental health.

Stress: some is normal

Stress is the feeling of pressure when something is challenging. A little stress can help, like the excited jitters that help you focus before a big game. But too much stress for too long can make you feel tired, grumpy, worried or sick.

Two kinds of stressful situations

  1. Situations you have some control over: a test, a project due Friday, a piano recital, a disagreement with a friend. You can take action to change things.
  2. Situations you have less control over: moving to a new city, a family member being sick, parents separating, a pet dying, a storm cancelling a trip. You can't change what happened, but you can adapt: change how you respond and take care of yourself.
What I can't controlWhat I cancontrol
The circle of control: focus your energy on the inside circle, what you can control.

Strategies for managing stress

Thinking strategies (changing how you think):

  • Positive self-talk: change "I'll never get this" to "This is hard, but I can try one step at a time."
  • Look at it another way (reframe): "Moving is scary, but I might make new friends."
  • Focus on what you can control: use the circle of control.
  • Remember past successes: "I was nervous last time, and I did fine."

Action strategies (things you do):

  • Make a plan: break a big task into small steps and start early.
  • Deep breathing: breathe in slowly for 4, hold for 4, out for 4.
  • Get moving: go for a walk, dance, shoot hoops.
  • Talk to someone you trust.
  • Do something calming: draw, read, listen to music, spend time with a pet.
  • Keep routines: regular sleep, meals and activities give you a sense of safety during big changes.
breathe infor 4hold for 4breathe outfor 4repeat
Triangle breathing: breathe in for 4, hold for 4, breathe out for 4, then repeat.

When to get help

Everyone feels stressed or sad sometimes. But if a feeling is very strong, lasts a long time, or makes it hard to sleep, eat, go to school or enjoy things, tell a trusted adult. Asking for help is a strong thing to do. You can also call or text Kids Help Phone any time: 1-800-668-6868, or text CONNECT to 686868.

Worked example

Let's manage a stressor you can control

Liam has a science fair project due in one week and hasn't started. He feels panicky.

  1. Is it in my control? Mostly yes: he can choose how and when to work.
  2. Thinking strategy: self-talk: "I have a week. If I do a bit each day, I can finish."
  3. Action strategy: make a plan. Day 1: pick a topic. Days 2 and 3: research. Days 4 and 5: build. Day 6: poster. Day 7: practise.
  4. Calm the body: when panic rises, take three slow breaths.
  5. Ask for help: ask his teacher a question about the rubric.

When you have some control, take action: plan, break it into steps, use positive self-talk and ask for help.

Worked example

Let's adapt to a stressor you can't control

Hana's family is moving to a new city in the summer. She feels sad and worried about leaving her friends.

  1. Is it in my control? No, the move is happening.
  2. **What is in her control?** How she says goodbye, how she stays in touch, how she takes care of herself.
  3. Thinking strategy: reframe: "I'll miss my friends, and I can video-call them. I might find a new soccer team."
  4. Action strategies: make a goodbye scrapbook, plan calls with friends, keep her routine of evening walks with her dad, and talk about her feelings.
  5. Accept the feelings: feeling sad is normal. It will get easier with time.

When you have less control, adapt: focus on what you can control, accept your feelings, keep routines and get support.

Hands-on activity

My mental health toolkit

You need: a shoebox or envelope, paper strips, markers.

  1. On paper strips, write everyday choices that help your mental health (one per strip), like "walk the dog" or "read before bed."
  2. On different-coloured strips, write stress strategies: at least 3 thinking strategies and 3 action strategies.
  3. Draw a circle of control on a page. Think of something stressing you right now. Write what you can control inside and what you can't outside.
  4. Put everything in your toolkit box.
  5. For one week, pick one strategy each day and try it. Put a check on the strips you liked best.
  6. Share your favourite strategy with your family. Maybe they'll try it too!
Just for fun

Funny but true: sea otters sometimes hold paws while they sleep so they don't drift apart. Even otters know that staying connected feels good!

Your turn

1

What is mental health?

2

Name four everyday choices that help mental health.

3

Is a spelling test a stressor you have some control over or less control over? Explain.

4

Is a grandparent getting sick something you have some control over or less control over?

5

Give an example of positive self-talk.

6

Name two action strategies for stress.

7

When should you tell a trusted adult about stress or sad feelings?

More practice: warm-up

1

How many hours of sleep do kids your age need?

2

True or false: everyone has mental health.

3

Name a calming activity you enjoy.

4

What is the Kids Help Phone number?

5

Is asking for help a sign of weakness?

More practice: on your own

1

Change this self-talk to positive: "I'm terrible at math. I'll fail."

2

Why does being active help with stress?

3

Your best friend is mad at you. What parts are in your control?

4

Sort into thinking or action strategy: deep breathing, reframing, making a plan, remembering a past success.

5

Why do routines help during big changes?

Challenge

1

Your hockey tournament is cancelled because of a snowstorm. You were really excited. Use the circle of control to make a plan.

2

Explain how sleep and screen time can be connected to mental health.

3

Create a 5-step plan for a big stressful day, like the first day at a new school, using at least one thinking and one action strategy.

Check your understanding

Quiz

1.

Which everyday choice helps mental health?

2.

Which stressor do you have some control over?

3.

Which is a thinking strategy?

4.

When something is out of your control, it helps to...

5.

Which is positive self-talk?

6.

When should you tell a trusted adult about your feelings?

For parents and teachers

Big idea: This lesson covers two Grade 4 expectations: demonstrate an understanding of how choices they make every day can have a positive impact on their mental health (D2.5), and demonstrate an understanding of different strategies they can use to manage stress in situations in which they have some control, as well as to adapt to challenging situations over which they have less immediate influence (D3.3). The curriculum's key learning describes these strategies as cognitive (thinking) and behavioural (action).

How to help at home:

  • Model coping out loud: "I'm stressed about work. I'm going to make a list and go for a walk."
  • Draw a circle of control together when your child is worried.
  • Protect sleep, activity, family meals and outdoor time.
  • Validate feelings before solving: "That sounds really disappointing."

When to seek help: if your child's worry, sadness or anger is intense, lasts weeks, or affects sleep, eating, school or friendships, talk to your family doctor or your school. Kids Help Phone (1-800-668-6868, or text CONNECT to 686868) is free and available 24/7. In an emergency, call 911.

Sleep and activity amounts come from the Canadian 24-Hour Movement Guidelines for Children and Youth.

This lesson also builds coping skills (A1.2) and identifying and managing emotions (A1.1).