A. Developing the Skills, Strategies, and Habits Needed to Succeed · Skills, Strategies and Habits for Success

Recognizing Stress in Mind, Body and Spirit

A1.2About 65 minutes

Learning goals

I can explain what stress is and how the body's stress response works.
I can tell helpful short-term stress apart from stress that is building up or overloading me.
I can recognize signs of stress in my body, thoughts, emotions, behaviour and spirit.
I can use positive self-talk to reframe unhelpful thoughts.
I can explain when and where to get more help.

Words to know

stress
The body's and mind's response to a demand or challenge.

stressor
Something that causes stress, such as a test, a conflict, a change or a heavy workload.

stress response
The body's automatic reaction to a stressor (sometimes called fight, flight or freeze): faster heartbeat, faster breathing, tense muscles.

stress signature
Your own personal pattern of early signs that stress is building.

thinking trap
A common unhelpful way of thinking, such as expecting the worst, that makes stress feel bigger.

reframe
To look at a situation or thought in a different, more balanced and accurate way.

holistic
Looking at the whole person (mind, body, emotions and spirit) and how the parts connect.

The night before

It's 11 p.m. on a Sunday in February. Kai has a presentation in history tomorrow, a shift at the arena snack bar after school, and a group chat that won't stop buzzing. His heart is thumping, his shoulders are up near his ears, he has read the same slide five times without taking it in, and he keeps thinking, "I'm going to freeze and everyone will laugh."

Kai is not weak and nothing is wrong with him. He is stressed. The first step in managing stress is learning to recognize it, early, in your own mind, body and spirit.

A note before you start

This lesson is about everyday stress. If stress, sadness or worry has lasted for weeks, gets in the way of school, sleep, eating or friendships, or you have thoughts of hurting yourself, please talk to a trusted adult. You can contact Kids Help Phone any time (call 1-800-668-6868 or text CONNECT to 686868), or call or text 9-8-8 (the Suicide Crisis Helpline). In an emergency, call 911.

What stress is

Stress is your body's and mind's response to a demand or challenge. The thing that causes it is called a stressor.

When your brain senses a challenge, it sets off the stress response. Hormones such as adrenaline and cortisol are released. Your heart beats faster, you breathe faster, your muscles tense and your body gets ready for action. People sometimes call this fight, flight or freeze. It evolved to help with physical danger, but your body reacts in a similar way to a presentation, an argument or an exam.

Short bursts of stress can actually help: they can sharpen your focus before a game or a test. Stress becomes a problem when it is too intense or lasts too long without a break. Then it can affect sleep, mood, concentration, health and relationships.

Common stressors for Grade 10 students include tests and deadlines, part-time work, sports and tryouts, friendships and relationships, family responsibilities or changes, money worries, social media, and news about the world. Even good events (a new job, a big game, a first date) can be stressors.

Stress is not all bad. Helpful pressure gets you ready. When stress is building, use your strategies. When it becomes overload for weeks, it is time to get more help.

Signs of stress

Stress shows up in many parts of you at once:

Body: fast heartbeat, fast breathing, tight muscles, headaches, upset stomach, feeling tired, changes in sleep or appetite.
Mind (thoughts): racing or looping thoughts, worry, trouble concentrating, forgetting things, expecting the worst.
Emotions: irritable, overwhelmed, anxious, teary, short-tempered.
Behaviour: putting things off, pulling away from friends, snapping at people, scrolling for hours, changes in eating.
Spirit: feeling disconnected from yourself, other people, your culture or what gives your life meaning; losing interest in things that usually matter to you.

Everyone has a stress signature, their own early warning signs. One person gets a headache; another gets snappy; another can't fall asleep. Knowing yours lets you act before stress reaches overload.

Stress affects the whole person. The labels show common signs in the mind, body, emotions, behaviour and spirit. Your own early signs are your stress signature.

Mind, body and spirit are connected

The parts affect each other. Worrying (mind) can keep you awake. Poor sleep (body) makes it harder to concentrate, so you fall behind, which creates more worry. Feeling disconnected from friends or from what matters to you (spirit) can make stress feel heavier. The good news: helping one part often helps the others. A walk outside (body) can quiet looping thoughts (mind).

Many First Nations, Métis and Inuit approaches to wellness are holistic: they see well-being as a balance of physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health, connected to family, community, culture and the land. The First Nations Mental Wellness Continuum Framework, developed with First Nations partners, describes mental wellness as including a sense of hope, belonging, meaning and purpose. You will look at balance more closely two lessons from now.

Positive self-talk: notice, name, reframe

Stress is often made bigger by thinking traps, common ways of thinking that are not quite accurate:

Fortune-telling: predicting the worst. ("I'm going to freeze.")
Mind-reading: assuming you know what others think. ("Everyone will laugh.")
All-or-nothing thinking: seeing things as total success or total failure. ("If I don't get 90, I've failed.")
Catastrophizing: turning one problem into a disaster. ("If I mess this up, my whole year is ruined.")

Positive self-talk is not pretending everything is great. It is replacing a trap with a thought that is balanced and accurate:

Notice the thought.
Name the trap.
Reframe it into something true that helps you act.

Reframing does not deny the feeling ("I'm nervous"). It replaces the trap with an accurate thought that points to what you can do.

Day	Stress (1 to 10)	What was happening	What I noticed
Mon	3	normal day	nothing much
Tue	6	history project due Friday	tight shoulders, snapped at my sister
Wed	4	hockey practice	felt better after
Thu	7	project + extra shift	shoulders, couldn't fall asleep
Fri	5	project handed in	headache in the morning, relief after
Sat	2	slept in, family dinner	relaxed
Sun	8	presentation tomorrow	heart racing, looping thoughts, couldn't focus

Kai's stress log for one week.

Worked example

Let's read Kai's stress signature

Kai kept a stress log for one week (the table above). Find his stress signature and the stressors that set it off.

Look for repeated signs on the high days (6 or more): tight shoulders (Tue, Thu), trouble sleeping (Thu), snapping at people (Tue), racing heart and looping thoughts (Sun).
Kai's stress signature: tight shoulders and irritability come first (at 6). Sleep trouble and looping thoughts come when it is higher (7 to 8).
Find the stressors: deadlines and presentations, especially when stacked with extra work shifts.
Find what helped: hockey practice (Wed) and rest and family time (Sat) brought his level down.
Plan: when Kai notices tight shoulders or snapping, that is his signal to use his strategies (you will build a toolkit in the next lesson).

Kai's early warning signs are tight shoulders and irritability. His main stressors are deadlines stacked with extra shifts. Physical activity and family time help.

Just for fun

Why was the calendar so stressed out?

Because its days were numbered. (Unlike your stress, which you can learn to manage one day at a time.)

Hands-on activity

My stress signature log

You need: a notebook or the notes app on a phone, for 5 to 7 days.

Once a day, at about the same time (for example after dinner), write: the date, your stress level from 1 to 10, what was happening, and what you noticed in your body, thoughts, emotions, behaviour and spirit.
Also note anything that lowered your stress that day.
At the end, circle the signs that show up on your higher days. Which ones appear first? That is your stress signature.
Pick one thinking trap you caught yourself in and write a notice, name, reframe for it.
Optional: ask a family member, "What do you notice about me when I'm stressed?" Others often spot our signs before we do.

What to look for: at least 5 entries, specific signs ("tight jaw" rather than "bad"), one early warning sign identified, and an accurate reframe. Keep your log private unless you choose to share it.

Your turn

What is the difference between stress and a stressor?

Describe three things that happen in your body during the stress response.

Give one example of stress that is helpful.

Name one sign of stress in each of these areas: body, mind, emotions, behaviour.

What is a stress signature, and why is it useful to know yours?

Name the thinking trap: "If I don't make the team, my whole high school life is ruined."

Reframe this thought: "My boss gave me a weird look. She thinks I'm terrible at this job."

More practice: warm-up

Name two hormones released during the stress response.

True or false: only bad events cause stress.

Give one sign of stress that affects the spirit.

What are the three steps of positive self-talk in this lesson?

Give the phone number or text option for Kids Help Phone.

More practice: on your own

Explain, with an example, how a problem in the mind can lead to a problem in the body.

Why is positive self-talk not the same as telling yourself "Everything is perfect"?

Name the thinking trap and reframe it: "I got a B on this quiz, so I'm a failure."

A friend has been sleeping badly, skipping meals and avoiding everyone for three weeks. Which zone of the stress gauge is this, and what should happen?

Explain what a holistic view of wellness means, with one example.

Challenge

Some stress before a test can improve performance, but too much makes it worse. Explain why both are true, using the stress response.

Look at this log: Mon 4 (normal); Tue 7 (two tests; headache, snapped at a friend); Wed 3 (swim practice); Thu 7 (job shift + essay; headache, couldn't sleep); Fri 2 (movie night). Identify the stress signature, the main stressor and one thing that helps.

Write a notice, name, reframe for this thought from a student starting their first co-op placement: "Everyone there will know so much more than me. They'll think I don't belong."

Check your understanding

Quiz

What is a stressor?

Which is part of the body's stress response?

Which statement about stress is true?

What is a stress signature?

"Everyone will think my idea is stupid." Which thinking trap is this?

Stress, sadness or worry has lasted for weeks and is affecting sleep and school. What is the best step?

For parents and teachers

Big idea: Expectation A1.2 asks students to identify strategies for managing stress. The curriculum's teacher prompts include recognizing when they are stressed, noticing links among mind, body and spirit, positive self-talk, and First Nations, Métis and Inuit approaches to harmony and balance. This lesson is about recognizing stress; the next two lessons build the strategies.

How to help: Tell your teen what your stress signature is ("I get short with people and clean the kitchen"). Gently share what you notice in them, without judgment. Model reframing out loud: "I'm catastrophizing; the car repair is annoying, but we can handle it."

Common difficulties:

Thinking all stress is bad. Some stress is useful.
Believing positive self-talk means pretending. Emphasize accurate thoughts.
Not noticing physical signs. The log activity helps.

Important: everyday stress is normal, but if you notice weeks of changes in sleep, eating, mood or friendships, or any talk of self-harm, contact your family doctor or the school's guidance or social work staff. Kids Help Phone (1-800-668-6868, text CONNECT to 686868) and 9-8-8 are available 24/7; call 911 in an emergency.